The people of Ireland have burst out in wild celebrations overnight after a referendum passed allowing pregnant women to terminate unwanted pregnancies.
Feminists have long fought for abortion rights due to the belief their babies belong to them so they can kill them if they want to.
“My body, my choice” rang out across the streets of Dublin and for Yes voter Laura Windmill it was a sweet victory that had her dancing with joy.
“For too long we’ve had to act like there was something wrong with killing our unborn children.” she said.
“For too long we’ve had to listen to people who think life is sacred and shouldn’t be flushed down a drain just because my drunken one night stand didn’t have a good enough pull out game”
“Women will never be free until they are allowed to do whatever they want and being able to kill our unborn children is a giant leap forward for women’s rights”
Although the celebrations were widespread not all Yes voters joined in the party.
“I voted Yes as well but I wish all those feminists would tone it down a little.” Dublin local Peter Jameson said.
“They’re dancing in the streets like they’ve just won the world cup when all they’ve really done is voted in favour of hacking up babies in the womb and yanking them out piece by piece.”
“It’s such an odd thing to celebrate”
“But on the plus side every abortion is one less person polluting up the earth so I’m not going to complain too much”
Catholic Priest Terry O’Shannesy, who is one of the few priests yet to be implicated in sex offences involving un-aborted children, said he voted No in the referendum and received a backlash for doing so.
“Everyone called me evil for voting No.” he told us.
“Just because I didn’t think life should be devalued to the point where it’s common to flush out a fetus like a clogged pipe because your drunken one night stand forgot to blow his beans on your chest or your chin.”
“I mean what if Jesus had been aborted?’